Who Am I without you episode 2
When I got home after the incident with mike, my mother rushed towards me crying. She was panting, and pacing around our living room as if she there was fire on the mountain. I kept asking her, “Mama, what’s wrong?” she was so shaken she could not even form words with her mouth. All I remembered her saying before I fainted was “Dare!”
When she managed to revive me, I instantly got up. With both hands on my head I asked her “What happened to Dare?” when she broke the news to me, I almost fainted again. She said his teacher called her that they rushed Dare to the hospital; it was a car accident. In my now spinning head, I was crying “No! No! No! No! This cannot be happening now.” I quickly grabbed my car keys and ran out the door.
As soon as I got to the hospital, I saw the doctor in the reception area. He managed to calm me down, and told me that although Dare might have lost a lot of blood, they were able to save him. Immediately, my now wondering eyes drifted to the lady standing next to the doctor. I rushed to her side, I grabbed a hold on the woman who I knew to be dare’s teacher. I started yelling, and raining curse’s on the poor lady. “What happened to my son? What have you done! I am going to sue you, and your school!” I kept on ranting about. The nurses there were telling me, “Madam Calm down, just be glad your son is okay. There is no cause for all this.” Their effort at calming me down was worthless. They did not understand that this just wasn’t about my son. This was the only way I have been able to finally let all my frustrations out, it just so happened that this lady was the victim. When my mom finally came to my side, she said Dare had woken up, and was asking to see me. Then I came back to my senses, and let go of the lady.
After I settled next to where Dare was laying on the hospital bed, I asked him to tell me what happened. He said, “Mommy, I thought it was daddy that was outside the gates, so I ran out to tell him mummy keeps crying at night, so he can come back home.” he said to me crying, and in the process he got ran over by a car. I just sat there with no words to say.
Few days after Dare was discharged from the hospital. I decided to call Bolu, to inform him of what had happened to his son. A lady picked up, I initially thought it was his new girl, and I was right. As soon as she heard my name, her voice changed. She said, “ My husband is not home. Is there something we can help you with.” I thought to myself, “Under how many months, the babe is already claiming Bolu as “Husband”.” Then I said to her, “Well if you don’t mind, tell him his son almost died, and if that is not enough to knock him back to his senses, I don’t know what will.”
She attacked, saying “What son? The only child my Bolu has or will have, is the one I am planning on giving him.”
So I asked “Come oh, do you know who you are talking to?”
She jumped on me like an angry lion, “And so? Who are you? Ehn tell me. Are you the first lady in Naija to get divorced? You won’t let me and my husband rest all cause he managed to get you pregnant, and was then forced to stay because of the baby.”
She went on saying “Now the child we are talking about is no longer a baby, so what’s there to make him stay? Why can’t you just understand that? The guy don wash he hand from your matter; his tired!!”
I sat there with my mouth opened, and no words of response were coming out. She just kept on talking, and talking, and talking as if she knew everything about what was going on, and I was the one in the dark. Since Bolu’s new wife would not let me speak to him, I decided to go to his office.
When I got there, his employees were whispering about as soon as they saw me walk in. Some were saying, “Oga don leave her. Eya, what is she going to do now.” Some pitied me, and some laughed at my face. I guess the news that I was no longer their madam had gotten to them already. When they finally agreed to let me see their Oga, I walked into his office with all the courage I had left in me.
The first thing he said was who allowed me in. I did not come here to argue with him but I think I am going to have to do just that!
I began, “Your son Dare, do you still remember him?” I asked, walking closer to where he was seating. He just kept looking at me with his “And-so-what” face. I continued, not letting anything shake me. I had to do this for my son.
“He almost died!…” I could not hold myself together anymore. I felt the hot tears that I have kept away for so long start to cascade down my face. “Bolu, our son!” I yelled at him, slamming my purse on his desk. I wanted him to remember something, so I held his face close to mine. He said to me, “What sought of insanity is this? Have you lost your mind?”
“Oh yes Bolu, I have lost it.” I said “I lost it the day you decided to walk out on us. The day you decided to walk out on our family! The day you decided to walk out on our love. The day you decided to walk out on me! Me! Bolu!”
I carried on, “Our son who is innocent in all this, is the one left to suffer; are you happy? I asked him.
He started warning me to lower my voice, that if I don’t calm down he would send me out.
“This is not the right place for all this. For Christ sake! My workers are all listening.” He said.
“Let them listen oo Bolu, let them hear me. Let them know the kind of person you really are.” “A worthless man, who has no pride. A selfish he-goat who I was stupid enough to open my legs for. Your true colors are coming out now abi? But why now?”
“After all we shared!”
He raised his hand up, almost as if he was going to hit me. But as fast as he raised it up, he quickly droped the hand. I could see he was boiling of anger, and I was ready for anything that will happen next.
For the first time in months, Bolu looked at my face. The face he knew very well right from our teen days. I could see in his eyes that something was still there. He looked at me as if his eyes were clearer now. It was the same look he gave me on the day we first met; it was the same look he gave me on our wedding day, but this time it was clouded with something else; pride.
“Maybe it would be best if I give u a phone call later.” He said to me, as he tried to hold my hands. I told him I had already tried that but his wife would not let me speak to him.
For God sake, what was all this? What mixed signal is he sending my way? Am I paranoid, and beginning to see things that’s weren’t even there. Did I accomplish anything by coming here today? Was it the news of his son that brought all this or was it my presence? All these thoughts were flying through my head as I walked out from his office.
At the end of the day, I realized I just succeeded in making my wounds deeper.