Diary of a broke Playboy episode 14
“Dump who” shape asked for the second time as she walked up to us. We just stared at her as she got close to the bed and saw Jennifer.
“What’s wrong with her?, why is she lying like this?”
“Nothing do am, shey we tell you to stay in my room that we were coming” James replied her.
“I wasn’t asking you, i was asking Neche” she said and faced me.
“I don’t really know, we were together when she started shaking and then this whitish something was coming out of her mouth, i don’t know what happened “.
Shape climbed the bed and observed her closer than i or James could ever get. She felt her temperature and did other checks while I just stood there, me and James staring at her.
” she still dy alive? ” I asked
” she don die? ” James asked
“Her body is still warm” She replied us
“But she won’t die naa, eh shape, i should have listened to you when you said she was an Ogbanje”
“chilax naa, let me finish Checking her”.
We stood there watching. I upgraded her to my savior at that instant. We watched her like she had the final say whether Jennifer would live or die. She seemed to know what she was doing from the look of things.
“Bring water and a towel” she instructed. James and i fell over each other while going for the water. The water appeared in no time and soon she was damping her forehead with the wet towel and wiping her face too. She soon rounded up and got up from the bed.
“So? ” i asked
” She’s still breathing, do you know if she is epileptic?”
“Epilepsy kwa, i don’t know o” i said
“Hmm, Don’t worry she will be fine, she will soon wake up” she said and hugged me, ordinarily i would have grabbed every part of her body, but this night was different, the hug was more of a consolation than a flirt but i needed it though. An extra reading seat came in from James room and we all sat, watching Jenny on the bed like a cinema.
5 minutes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes passed, nothing happened. My worry returned but Shape’s calmness kept me reassured.
2 hours later, we were all nodding from sleepiness and tiredness when she moved. I jumped from my seat and watched as she got up slowly, i felt like going over there and hugging her but i checked myself. We all got up and moved to her.
“Are you okay?” i asked her
“What happened?” James asked. Shape just looked.
“I’m fine, just a slight headache”
“Thank God, you scared the hell out of us” Shape finally said.
After much clarity, we bundled her into shapes room where they both were to sleep together, i didn’t need further rough play. I was visibly shaken.
We sat on the bed staring into space.
“Guy i no do again ” i said to James without looking at him.
” Do what?”
“Girls, i no chase again, e don do for me”
” And her too, maybe ”
“No no, she’s a devil”
I kept quiet and just eyed him. His face was expressionless but i knew James, it was still on the way and then it came. He fell on the bed and downloaded all the laughter he could find on me, it wasn’t funny at all.
“Guy see as you para, James i don kill person, them go arrest me, my papa go kill me, my mama, hahahahahaha, guy i no know say you can para like this”.
James just laughed me into coma.
“Guy pity me naa, do you know that i French kissed and sucked this girl’s mouth, that mouth wey that thing comot for am, guy i hope say this thing is not communicable o”
“And so? If en dy communicable nko?”
“Wetin u mean, if i contact am, you go happy like this, say i go dy fall and dy spit anyhow? ”
” Before nko, at least e better pass Hiv” he said and restarted his laughing bouts
“James, oya begin dy go your room”.
So today i saw a girl, a young girl, damn she was hot. She wore this short skirt that shot her laps out like hot live bullets, the sexiness of those laps can set the eyes on fire, and it was her selling point. Two hot laps plugged to a wide hotter hips shooting out a protruding ass out the back, jeez i could choose that figure over Beyonce’s face. Her upper body wasn’t bad either, full breasts struggling to jump out of a skimpy dress. As we all know, not all girls can have that killer figure and still get a cute face to match, except a selected few. It was either a cute face for you and a slim body or a hot body and not so cute face. This particular girl had the body but her face tried shaa. But wor dah fuur, i can as well cover her face and do her, i don’t think the man down there, i mean that niggar, the one wey Brymo say hin no get shoulder, yea the prick, i don’t think he cares about the face. That girl apart let’s go straight to the issue at hand.
So after that mind wrecking event that took place in my room that night between me and Jennifer, i seemed to have lost my appetite for girls and now brush my teeth 3 times a day, i have stopped shaa, since i noticed that my toothpaste finished easily since i commenced that practice and since i had no money to spend on toothpastes,i just brushed with toothpaste and brush once a day and the rest of the time i just chew stick. I didn’t enjoy it, just that after seeing a girl i literally licked her mouth spit that thing out, my mouth developed a new kind of taste that wasn’t so pleasing. I don’t know if it was my mind playing games on me or whatever but then i brush 3 times a day.
James and Shape never for once spared me the details of that nights affairs especially whenever i’m having a go at them. Shape was a perfect actress, she would give me a short play on my reaction that day while James gave the vocals perfectly, it didn’t get stale and trust me, it wasn’t funny.
School closed on 22nd of December and everyone went home. I got to the house, the first thing i did was break my engagement with Amara. I decided i needed to sacrifice something to God for denying the devil the chance to ridicule me via Jennifer.
So i went for midnight mass. Started by 10pm, i was in league with the Holy Spirit as i went to church with my Bible in my right hand and my Holy rosary in my left hand, i was ready to cast out and bind the devil of womanization in my life, i was going to be born anew along with Christ and that was my new year resolution. With a delicious hymn banging in my heart, i went into the church and found a seat for myself.
The service went smoothly and i was committed to it. The officiating priest’s sermon was direct from heaven, it touched the softest part of my heart that no girl had gotten to, not even my first crush.
So i was busy being in the spiritual mood when this daughter of eve from where i do not know, not minding the fact that she was late to church still had the guts to be swinging her fine ass in the face of everybody, especially mine walked in. The Lord forbid that the devil will mess up this day for me. I decided i wasn’t going to be tempted today, not today. I wouldn’t have been tempted though if the girl had respected herself and found another seat but no, this piece of unbroken fine china decided the seat in front of me was the best for her.
She was undeniably beautiful on her long black gown. Chocolate in complexion and smooth skinned. Perky boobs and curvy hips graced her body, my exact full course meal. Either the Holy Spirit had left me or he was also admiring this piece with me. I fought and fought and was conquered. The rest of the service wasn’t even for me. This girl replaced my Bible. I looked at her more than i looked at the Holy book. Church service rounded up by 1 am. In my rush to interact with the girl i almost left my spiritual properties behind. Since i wasn’t successful in being born again, i had to know that girl, i can’t come and go and lose on both sides naa.
“Merry xmas” i said as i walked up to her, my Bible clutched under my armpit and my rosary in my pocket.
“Wish you the best”
“Are you from this side”
“yes, why do you ask”
“Nothing really, just that I have not seen something like you in this part before ”
” Hmmm, Something like me?” she said and looked at me.
“Exquisite, you look take away”
“Welcome, i’m already liking you but don’t take it to heart, i tend to fall in life with pretty things easily “.
It was night and she was dark but i could see the blush on her.
” Hmm, you don’t even know my name and you are liking me already”
“I can like you without a name, i even have a name for you sef”.
She laughed and i smiled.
“Yea, your face shines in the darkness ”
” What’s your own name? ”
” Chimnaechelum”. I tried to make it sound sexy.
“Nice name ”
So we got to where we were supposed to part ways, i realized that i had been top busy talking nonsense that i forgot to collect her number earlier on. I asked for it, she said no, said that we would still see, i asked where, she said she lived around, i should ask people about her. We said our Good nights and second merry xmas and i started running home before they lock the doors on me. I was on my way home when it hit me that I don’t even know the girls name, how do i ask people about her. Mtcheeeew. Instead of getting her name, i was busy giving her a new one(which kind carelessness be that na). So eventually, born again i no born, get the girl i no get. Angrily i walked home almost stumbling to the ground more than once. I got home and met Amara in the parlor, she Just got back from the church.
“Brother happy Christmas”.
She said that with a frown on her face. She was still bitter with me ever since i dumped her.
“Wish you the best, come to my room sharp sharp” i said and ran upstairs leaving her behind in confusion. She came in some minutes later.
“Are you in your period?” i asked her.
“Lock the door and come “…
I broke my new year resolution before i had even gotten to new year.
So my breakup with Amara lasted only 2 days and my born again life lasted only a few days. Anyway, i don’t blame myself, nobody can have someone like Amara in the house and still be a good Christian except you are a masturbator. I love my life the way it is, one thing must kill a man but i don’t want mine to be girls shaa. Things between me and Amara wasn’t business as usual, everybody was back home for xmas and the house was full and busy. My elder brother, Williams and 2 elder sisters, Rita and Ogechukwu, i shared my room with Williams. Even amidst all those disturbances, we managed to make a way for ourselves, we did it in my bathroom, it wasn’t so smooth but at least, we always cum and that was the real deal. At night, in my mom’s sienna, chai, i pray that car no go knack engine. We have even done it inside a wardrobe once but it was so uncomfortable that we cancelled it after that day. Chinaza had traveled to her village with the family so Amara was the only option.
My brother, Williams was the baddest thing i have ever come across, he taught me everything i know about girls and is still teaching me. He was the reason i met Chinaza. I will give the full gist next time.
Williams came to me on 28th and said he wanted to flex.
“Guy go and flex naa abi i tie you rope?”
“I need company ” he said smiling.
” Confirm, i go follow you as far as say you go pay ”
” Follow me go where, i be you like Homo?, i dy talk girls mumu”
“Okay naa, carry momsy go, or Rita”
“Noo, i can’t go with momsy, she go dy order malt for herself and pure water for me, Rita too is impossible, she go carry her fiance come “. He said and we both laughed.
“So you no get any babe wey you go borrow me?”
“No, make we go scouting naa”
“na the best thing for now”
After much brain washing and pleading, we acquired moms sienna and some cash from dad. Rita our big girl also rogered us. By 12 pm, we set out for a far away hotel. Willy drove while i changed music.
10 minutes drive and we stormed the hotel in our shinning black 2015 Toyota sienna. We secured a seat at the VIP section, a little far from where some group of people were celebrating what looked like a birthday.
We ordered four bottles of Heineken for starts. Asides from being a womanizer, willy was a drunkard too. I was still clearing the foams from the bottom of my first bottle when he ordered his 3rd bottle, but it was none of my business, i wasn’t the one paying. Two steaming plates of fresh fish pepper soup soon showed face and we went down on it. As we were introducing the food to our stomach, willy’s phone rang and he picked, he dropped the call with a smile that revealed his entire teeth.
“nelo is coming ”
” Who is nelo?”
“Which other nelo do you know that i know? ”
” Chinelo, Naza’s sister?”
He nodded and sipped his drink.
“I thought they traveled? Is naza coming with her”
“Call naza and ask her”